Thursday, August 10, 2006

"I didn't see the end of the game, I accidentally passed out." "You made a wise, wise choice."

You know, it would be one thing if, right out of the gate, the 2006 Red Sox had been a struggling, transition year team with enough holes that you'd think the Big Dig was responsible for its construction and the only bright spots were occasional moments of improbable offensive ecstasy (look up "improbable defensive ecstasy" in the dictionary and it will say "see also: Big Papi"). Because I get that. I spent a whole lot of years growing up watching the Giants try to build a team around Barry Bonds; I know what that kind of team looks like. And it would be another thing if it was only the veterans who were breaking down, Seanez and Tavarez aborting it up on cue, Timlin trying his best to pitch from AARP land, etcetera. And we'd all gnash our teeth, but we'd know that the rookies were transitioning in and getting it done, and that we just had to wait. But Hansen and Delcarmen have been making like Rudy junior and Julian junior lately, and Papelbon, well.

After the Red Sox swept in the ALDS last year, I made a list of three reasons to have hope. The first one was that Papelbon retired eight batters in the seventh and eighth innings of the third game, and the other two things were about the Yankees. The reason I declared during spring training that I wanted everyone to be always thinking about Papelbon is because he was the alpha and the omega of my big hopes for this season. When he starts faltering, I don't even know what.

So, anyway, Papelbon blew his fifth save last night in a completely reality-questioning loss to the Royals. If you like rubbing salt into your own festering wounds, you can read about it
here. Apparently aware that we're a fan base on the verge right now, Paps does have some words of wisdom that I will try and probably completely fail to take to heart:

"I won't bring this home with me," he said. `"As soon as I leave the ballpark, I'm done with it. There's no reason for me to take this home with me. You don't take your job home with you, and neither do I. Tomorrow's a new day, sun's going to rise tomorrow, and I just have to study a little bit of film, make a few adjustments, and keep moving forward. We've still got two months left in the season, and we've got a lot of work to do. There's no reason in sitting right here and pouting or getting upset or any of that."

Well. Okay. Four things, then, that don't make me want to drink at my desk:

1. Saw my first Big Papi Vitamin Water advertisement wrapped Green Line subway car yesterday.
2. There's a new Red Sox Rewind commercial. Paps is looming over Hazel, wearing what appears to be a pink or purple shirt under his wind breaker and turning in the kind of dramatic delivery we've come to know and love from such gems as the
125Auto ad. Also, Hazel in a tight v-neck. It's the little things.
3. Tito finally fixed the line-up. Poor Willy Mo was probably wondering if he was going to have to hit a home run to the moon to get that fifth spot.
4. I managed to not completely fuck our Blogger template and implement a site re-design.

And in the interest of blaming everything on Javy Lopez, last night in the eighth, Don said that Javy had been unhappy with his role with the Orioles because he'd been used primarily as a DH. Seriously, Javy Lopez filled the role of designated hitter for the Baltimore Orioles. There's sucking, and then there's that. And we've got a loooooooong way to go before it gets that bad.