Sunday, March 25, 2007

a closer's strength flows from the force



So, by mid-July, I obviously meant later on Thursday afternoon. Clearly, I should always check with the Schillblog before making any blog declarations of my own. Also, Papelbon totally keeps a pitching diary.


Jonathan Papelbon's Spring Training Diary

DAY 1: First day of the rest of my life as a starter!

DAY 4: Heard "Wild Thing" on the radio on the way to the complex this morning, had the song stuck in my head for the rest of the day. Don't know what that's about.

DAY 8: Timlin keeps calling me "Starter Boy." Yesterday, thought, I thought I heard him do that thing where you fake-cough and say a word while you're fake-coughing, and the word I thought he said while fake-coughing was "traitor." I didn't say anything, though, because I don't think I could take him, even when he's on the DL.

DAY 16: Had a weird nightmare last night. I was pitching, and I staked a seven-run lead, 10 Ks in 7 innings, nasty stuff. Then Julian gave up eight runs in the ninth and we lost. Then I woke up, but I couldn't fall back asleep for hours.

DAY 17: Had the nightmare again last night, except this time instead of Julian it was Joel Pineiro.

DAY 25: While I was signing autographs today, a kid asked me to ask Manny if he'd seen any teams auctioning a closer on Ebay.

DAY 26: Had the nightmare again, this time it was Donnelly.

DAY 27: I asked Ashley if she wants to watch The Lion King again tonight. She said she thinks I'm having "destiny issues." I said that if she wanted to watch Star Wars instead, she should have just said so. She said, "That's exactly my point." Have no idea what she was talking about.

DAY 28: Had the nightmare again last night, this time it was Seanez, and he doesn't even play for Boston anymore! Okay, maybe I miss closing a little bit.

DAY 29: Maybe I miss closing ... a lot.

DAY 30: Fuck it, I want to be the closer again. That's not weird, right? Maybe I should just start jogging out to the mound in the ninth. Maybe no one would notice? In times like these, I think WWTD (What Would Tek Do)?

DAY 31: Tek said, "Whatever you decide, I'll be proud of you, son." Thank God. Weird thing, though -- Schill was in the dugout with his laptop the whole time. He does that a lot lately. I don't know what he's doing -- maybe he's selling stuff on Ebay, too?

11 Comments:

At 4:04 PM, Blogger Mike said...

I would bid a gajillion $ on eBay for Closer Boy's pitching journal.

 
At 10:41 PM, Blogger kelly said...

almost as much as i'd pay for his light saber, i tell you what.

 
At 1:50 PM, Blogger Kristen said...

What we need to do is find out what Papelbon is going to get Hazel Mae for her wedding. Come on, you know whatever it is, it'll be SPECTACULAR.

 
At 3:56 PM, Blogger kelly said...

if there's a god, he gave her a picture of tito, and it caused her to come to her senses. because hazel + tito = my favorite unsubstaniated rumore EVER.

but that reminds me -- katie and i were talking earlier this week about how if you're a non-roster player for the blue jays, how can you justify marrying someone who's rumored to have hit it with kevin millar? wouldn't you worry about diseases? this devolved into a conversation about how even kevin millar is probably skeeved out at the idea of sleeping with kevin millar, and that he probably gives himself STDs taking a shower.

... um, maybe a nice silver platter?

 
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