christmas in april"I believe [Papelbon] would have been a very effective starter, but we know he has the rare psychological qualities of a dominant closer."
-- boston.com Q & A with John Henry
Curious about what exactly the "rare psychological qualities" of a dominant closer are (maybe I can grow one on my basement!) I did some poking around Wikipedia and this is what I came up with:
1. Strong resemblance to Simba in The Lion King.
2. Can take care of business with a mohawk when necessary.
3. Enjoys the taste of raw duck flesh.
4. Subdues prey with intimidating fist pump ritual.
So I guess we're good to go, then. Happy Opening Day, everybody!